You need to bear with me on this one, as I have a few things to explain, especially the elephant in the room. The fact that I’m suggesting that the more selfish you become the more considerate you will be! Slightly oxymoronic don’t you think?

As this is being published at the end of December 2015 I’d like to suggest that during this festive period and on from now, you give yourself the gift of selfishness! and it truly is a gift, those people who know its power and how best to use it really do live a more fulfilled, happy and on purpose life.

If you’re one of those people who go out of your way to help others, friends, families, people from work whenever they need you, then this really is for you. Now there is a caveat to this, you can’t simply go around denying help to anyone because you’ve listened to this and decided that yes, you do need to become a little bit more selfish. There’s method to this seeming madness. The route behind this, is that you need to look after number one first. And in all cases, and I mean all cases you are number 1 to you. There is a very clear reason why when we fly on aeroplanes we are told by the cabin crew to fit our own life jackets and oxygen masks before helping others. This reason is…… If we don’t look after ourselves, then we simply can’t help others! You see will be going now?

If you really consider yourself to be considerate and helpful, then you absolutely must do things to yourself first. Whether it’s eating the right foods and going to the gym. Or joining a salsa class at night, or even learning the new language. these things all conducive to allow you to live the life that you want, and feel the way that you want to feel. You need to make these things in your life and nonnegotiable, these types of activities and challenges are what keeps us young and it ticks the box that allows us to keep on growing.

There is another very interesting and paradoxical piece to this pie and I’m sure it’s a scenario that you’ve come across at some point in your life, perhaps even regularly.  Typically, people who do lots for those around them love ones friends etc tend to find that they don’t get appreciated for all the help that they offer and carry out these people. It might be borrowing money, lifts to the shops help decorating a room or whatever it may be. Once the task has been completed it seems to lack in appreciation. Now look at the other side of the coin, the other people who seem to do very little for others but when they do the slightest of favour or offer some assistance then the receiver seems to massively appreciate that help. These the times you find yourself saying “they do absolutely nothing all year and then offered the smallest piece of help and get given the most thanks”. Something very interesting is going on here and I think I may have an answer.

When a person is selfish and they do things for themselves first and foremost in nearly all cases then that person is fully rejuvenated, we charged and fulfilled. Any help they offer or assistance they give also comes with a shroud of this positive energy, and it’s this energy that gets appreciated but gets wrapped up in the assistance that is given. Therefore the receiver values the assistance far more from a selfish person because it comes with good energy and a good feeling. A person who is always give, give giving and spends very little time on themselves can in most cases help out or offer assistance however this is then shrouded in negative energy. and this is what the recipient receives which is possibly why they don’t appreciate it as much.

If you make yourself number one, and always prioritised things that you want to do for yourself first, any assistance you offer thereafter always comes subtly different in positivity and energy and this is what we get. just like the person who walks into the office can completely drain the energy from those around, a person who does not restore their own energy will have this vampire like effect regardless of their intentions.

So if you want to be more considerate be more selfish starting now!

Listen up, and see what else you learn and discover during this podcast, and leave me comments or contact me on social media to discuss anything.