This is part 2 of the NLP beliefs of excellence. Here is Part 1
You Cannot Not Communicate
We understand communication is something that we usually do verbally. However, any thoughts or feelings that are happening internally, will begin to affect us physiologically on the outside and therefore will be communicating with others how and where we are at that time. whether verbally or nonverbally we cannot not communicate, and others around us are always communicating.
The Meaning Of The Communication Is The Response You Get
I’m sure you can think of many times when you were talking with a person only to have them reject what you were saying and then you follow up with “that wasn’t what I meant.”
When you understand that we are all different and that there is no failure only feedback. You can begin to hold on to the belief that the meaning of the communication is the response that you get and therefore begin to take full ownership of your language and communication to ensure you get your message across in the way that you desire whilst paying particular attention to another person’s map.
There Is A Positive Intention Behind Every Behaviour
This is sometimes difficult belief to swallow. However, if you do accept that there is a positive intention behind every behaviour. Then you can begin to question and wonder how another person may have constructed that within their map of the world.
If you see someone demonstrate behaviour that you don’t like. What must be the positive intention for them at that time given the resources available to them?
Adopting this belief requires you to be curious and less judgemental.
People Are Always Making The Best Choices Available To Them
Each of us has our own unique personal history. this personal history defines and shapes our future choices and decisions. The combination of past events and history and current states emotions and knowledge allow people to make the best choices available to them at that time.
Ever heard the saying “with hindsight I’d……?”
This demonstrates that people are also able to review a situation or choice that they had made with hindsight and realise that they may have chosen something different had that information is available to them at that time.
There Is No Failure Only Feedback
This belief of excellence has become more and more common. However, break it down into its simplest form and it’s baffling it’s even a thing. Nearly everything that we learn to do in life comes from repetition, change in strategy or direction and multiple attempts until we improve or get it right.
If as a child, we didn’t have this embedded within us. Would all be crawling as adults is after failing, falling down repeatedly. We would see as a failure rather than feedback and be done with our lot crawling on all hands and knees for the rest of our lives.
As adults though, most of us shy away from the potential of failure. this is just a gentle reminder to say that every time you fail, you’ll receive feedback and you’ll be better able to make a more educated move the next time.
We Have All Of The Resources That We Need
This can be a very empowering belief. I remember saying to my first NLP Trainer “but we don’t, that’s why we need to learn new things. We don’t have the resources but with learning, we can have.“
To which he responded, “and you do have the resources you need to know that you need to learn more which is why you’re on this course.”
Whenever I think of this belief of excellence now, I always think of the film my left foot
Sometimes the resources that we need are available to us they just require a little bit more effort.
Try some of these beliefs of excellence on size and noticed the impact that they have.